The rain is coming…

Well it will begin tonight and I mean the word I am saying is rain. We are going to be in a huge rain band until Tuesday which means I should buy some lumber and start to build and ark. I mean isn’t that what Noah did? But the problem with Noah was he knew it was going to last forty days and forty nights. I mean I am only talking like maybe 5 days total of rain, and not 40. But when you see that you wanted to get things done in the next 5 days it just not going to happen for me. And I know that tiger is saying you better not be over working yourself here crane. And to tell you the truth tiger, I am excited about getting back on the horse here and getting things done in my life that have been missing for over seven months or more here. But then again I think that the rain is coming for a reason to, and to me I think that the power of the spirit is telling me to rest by the fire and sit with the dogs and look out the window with some hot green tea, and just watch the power of mother nature and how she will work her magic on the cleansing of this world.

I know tiger your thinking maybe to yourself that I might be on to something here, and that something I am thinking is that it’s okay to take things easy for awhile. I mean I did have a lot of issues with my health, and again taking things slow is just as good as the rain coming out of the sky. Mother nature can teach me a few things about who I am as a person. And I need to listen to her at times in my life here. Sometimes it’s hard when you want to get things done here.

Okay, I didn’t know where I was going with my speech of the evening I kind of got off the topic of where I was really going this evening. But I am truly okay with that I am. I mean that is life for me these days. But in the end of this post, the rain is still coming and I need to take things easy this weekend. And let me tell that it is harder to be patience with my crane spirit. I want to fly again, and I know that my wings are broken yet, and they are healing, but I have great people in my life telling me to push forward in everything we do. And when things get the hardest it’s okay to take things easy as in having that cup of warm tea and looking out the window and telling yourself that your life is going to be okay as this storm will pass over you.

Last note I have hit a new low of depression here in the last week more than the whole seven months of going through all of what I have gone through. It was hard to omit that I had a serious health issues this past week, and to tell you the truth I am scared, and I am not scared of what people think of me, I just want to be happy again and find that comfort in everyday things again. And lately I haven’t found any of this easy at all for me. I mean that is why I want to work hard again to take my mind off my depression, and when I am working I do not think of this things that have been following me around like a shadow. I know that I have the strength to getting over this depression, it’s just when is that question I have to ask myself. Just like the rain coming these next few days. I really don’t want it to come, but it is good for the rain to be coming because even when mother nature cries she knows that the answers come out in the tears of the rain.

And maybe, that is what I need to do is just cry this weekend, maybe that is what I need to do is follow mother natures advise with this rain as she is crying to pouring out her heart to this world. I need to just listen to the rain and find that peace that I have been truly looking for in the end. So with all these feelings in my soul, I am so sorry that this post was all over the place this evening. But I had to bleed these feelings out for myself. And sorry if this doesn’t make any sense to anyone out there. I found some relief in doing this. And tiger I am glad your still hanging in there for me in this rough time. This crane can’t thank the love and the words that you have shown for me. With this said, may you find what your looking for in the rain, because you never know what the drops just might be telling you in the end. Take care and many blessings…

6 thoughts on “The rain is coming…

  1. Hey there my friend,
    I am a little confused and a few pieces just feel strange and don’t seem to fit right when I read your lines.
    You talk about the past 7 months, being sick, not being able to do what you want. I would Imagine you might have sat around a lot, battled doctors, frustrated to feel like you haven’t lived over the past 7 months.
    Are you healed? They all of a sudden found what was wrong in this quick turn around? That would be amazing if that’s the truth and what actually happened.
    I can understand your heart being anxious to get going to distract you mind and to start living again, but just 3 days ago you almost died according to your sister. You almost died and she didn’t know how you would make it through the night slipping in and out of darkness, the coma she was talking about, but you get released to go home the next day? I’m going to give you some tough love and a hard time here because what reason do you have to be depressed now! You are miraculously alive, against the odds, and while you are all cut up according to your sister, you are sitting at the desk and you wish it wouldn’t rain so you get on with things. I had surgery before, minor to yours and I was in no capacity for any of that even though everybody always tells me about what a high threshold I have for pain.
    You know talking to your sister, trying to be by here side while she was worried about you dying, I felt a few times as if I was talking to you. Yeah, same family but also the same wording etc. a close bond for sure. I’m surprised you haven’t said nothing about our conversations. You had to have seen it, unless I did talk to you all along and that would probably warrant the quick recovery.
    Listen, I can’t help some intuitions but I do really care for people and about you my feathered friend. I do always stop by your blog and comment almost every time. I follow up on you and I’m the one that pursues us having contact as i seldom see you otherwise. I want you to be well and I don’t know what your depressions are from. Life has given you another chance to be there for your girl and that should make you very happy. You have people that care about you and it seems your sister must be right by your side which I hope that you are not alone. I guess so as you immediately responded back with her response to me telling you to say hi to her.
    So now that that tiger has scolded you a bit, please know that it’s meant in the most caring of ways. Some things just didn’t add up and being your friend, I promise I will always be honest with you. And yes I will say it…do allow yourself some time here.

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    1. My point is that I am blessed here your right for starters, and let me tell you I have the best family and friends out there that do care for me. But when I went through this darkness in the sickness, I realized coming out that it really hit me funny in the sense of that I was lied to from the medical staff, and I was suppose to trust them, and in the end they almost killed me. I know in my heart that I need to let that part of it go, but then again I was angry over this because I been telling them for seven months I been sick here and no one wanted to do anything and then to say to me out of the blue your going to die if we don’t do anything was the hardest thing that I could ever of heard. My sister loves me and she cares and her spirit and yours pulled me through this, and I need to go back like you said and realize once again I am alive. And that is the bottom line of this. I am glad your honest, that is how I live my life and I wouldn’t want anyone else not to live it with me in the sense of not being honest. So thank you for your kind words this evening. And I never took anything from this being a negative from you…

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      1. I’m glad you understand, as I do understand what it means to be lied to by the medical staff. We are all nothing but a bunch of dollar signs and the oath to help people in vulnerable and sick times may have been replaced with prescribing pills for kick backs. That’s why my rheumatoid arthritis continues to go untreated. 11 years ago as I was diagnosed they put me on cancer medicine without my knowledge until it almost wiped my white blood cell count out completely. I could have died from a common cold. So I do understand your anger, especially since you must have tons of expenses of which some or probably most could have been avoided.
        In the end you are here, alive and you will get better. You will go on with your life and I will watch you fly above me from the ground. 😉

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      2. Well, I have great insurance and I been blessed by that. And I have the VA as well helping if I need that as well. But the point I was trying to make in the end of this, I will get better and I didn’t mean to be so negative from before. I mean I want to ask you a question if I can, after all that you went through were you scared about what was going to happen to you in the sense of how your life was going to move on? I mean I know saying we all need to be strong is one thing, and I had my weaknesses in the last few weeks and months for that matter. But did you honestly stay strong or did you fall down like I did? Your thoughts on this when you have time…

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